Thanks to everyone who has provided advice about baby stuff. Keep those cards and letters coming by posting here. I will compile the comments and put a more accessible link somewhere on the blog ASAP.
The rumors started at around 11:00 am yesterday. I was in the English department office calculating final grades when one of the teachers came in and reported, "The kids say it's cold outside."
We all laughed, locked in the windowless dungeon as we were, feverishly punching calculator keys or (for the nerdier, such as myself) adjusting Excel formulas. I didn't actually get outside--or to a classroom with a window--until 3:15, and the kids were right! It was cool (if not actually cold). The heat wave is over!
My student teaching experience is also over. My grades have been turned in. All the kids passed, and all my seniors will graduate--even the one who wrote her final paper about how Adrienne Rich's poem "Planetarium" is a celebration of the first female astronaut's trip to the moon (except for that rather significant error, it was a pretty insightful paper).
So, now I have no excuse not to focus on The Project. There are cribs to be examined. Paint colors to be chosen. Furniture to be rearranged. For some people, I know this is the fun part. For me, though, it reminds me of planning my wedding, where I was forced to realize that I'm just not that kind of girl. I didn't have fantasies about dresses or place settings or bouquets so when I set about choosing those things, I spent a lot of time wondering if I was doing it right: Are ivory tablecloths tacky if my dress is white? Can hydrangeas be part of a fall bouquet? How is the bustle supposed to work?
I feel the same about baby stuff. I'm not going to see a crib and swoon that that's the crib I've always dreamed of--I don't think that's the infertility taking; it's just me. So mostly I'm just worried about picking the wrong thing: "Oh, my God, I can't believe you got the crib with 2 mattress positions instead of 3--don't you know that babies who sleep in 2 mattress position cribs average IQs that are 20 points lower than those who sleep in 3 mattress position cribs?"
It's a sickness, I know.