It's About the Stuff

Many moons ago, Grrl asked for suggestions from readers about the baby-related paraphernalia they found most essential.  She got a zillion or so responses that I read at the time, but as I wasn't quite there yet, I didn't take careful notes.

Now, thanks to the plagiarists that have caused Grrl to have to remove her archives from her blog, I find myself unable to access that resource.  Damn plagiarists!

So, I'm throwing myself on your mercy: what baby stuff does a minimalist city dweller in a small apartment really need?  I've chosen bedding, a crib, and a car seat/Snap N Go stroller combo.  What other essential items can I not live without?

Comments

[Kay]

Avent Microwave Bottle Sterilizer. Should you choose to breastfeed and/or pump - the pump parts can also go in it and be sterilized in FOUR minutes. Much faster than the dishwasher.

Bouncy Seat.

[Karin]

Swing...saved my sanity.

I used a wipe warmer because we had our baby in December and it was nice to not have to shock her cute little bottm with cold wet wipes.

And we used a bassinet until she moved into her own room.

[Kate]

Definitely a Snugli or some other type of baby carrier that attaches to your body, or better yet, the dh's body. The swing is a good idea too.

[Sarah]

I'd make sure and consult Moxie--she's ultra cool and she lives in your city and can give you tips on where and what.

Congratulations on moving into this phase!
Sarah

[Jo]

Hell if I know. I'm taking notes, over here.

[karla]

I laughed when my sis and bf said I couldn't live without LOTS of cloth diapers and receiving blankets. I am not laughing now. Cloth diapers will save your life and wardrobe. Also someone gave me a carseat cover that I could not live without. It zips up leaving the "occupant" safe from wind and rain, with a flap you can lift to check on them. It also slips on right over the carrier in seconds. It is a staple gift for me when I am called upon to give a gift.

[Brooklyn Mama]

I loved the Maya Wrap adjustable pouch (Boing Boing).

[Amie]

Expecting my fourth baby (also a minimalist). I would say a swing can be a life saver if your baby likes it (my second didn't). A sling can also be terrific if you find it comfortable.

[Kinneret]

Being the anal retentive ass that I am, I believe I saved that. Would you like me to send you a copy? Email me if so :)

[Enough Already]

Go and get the 6th Edition of Baby Bargains (ISBN 1889392197). The book will tell you everything you ever wanted to know about baby products and what you need and what is a complete waste of money.

btw, have you actually seen that crib? I thought I was going to get that one as well but when I went to Babies R Us, the crib they had on display was rather flimsy.

As for what other essential items you need - something for the little one to wear, i.e. cap, blanket sleepers, layette gowns, booties, etc...but according to the book, don't stock up on newborn sizes b/c your baby will quickly outgrow them.

[liz]

If you travel, a pack-n-play is great. A high-chair, bag sleepers, a gymini (portable and folds up to be put away)

[Brooklyn Girl]

Thanks all. Consensus: should one acquire both a bouncy seat and and a swing, or is it a reasonable plan to acquire just one of those and, if the kid doesn't take to it, then try out the other?

Kinneret--Someone more anal than me?! I love it! Will be in touch.

Enough Already--I have the book, and its thoroughness terrifies me. I have looked at the crib and I agree that it's not terribly impressive among the other cribs (though my SIL and others rave about it). I'm going back to look again later this week and may change my mind then.

Keep 'em coming.

[chris]

Anything that kept me mobile: Baby Bjorn and later, a nice MacLaren stroller.

By the way, there are tons of things I wish I hadn't bought. What a waste of money.

[TexasMama]

A sling! You must have a sling (or some kind of carrier), especially if you plan to walk the city a lot, and/or use public transport. I loved my Maya Wrap, though it can be a bit tricky to learn to use at first. A Baby Blorn works as well, but if you plan to nurse you can't really do it in a BB, and by the time my baby was 15 lbs it hurt my back. Sling was still great though.

Personally I HATED the Snuggli and most people I talked to did as well. BB is well worth the extra money, though my vote still goes to a sling, as there is some controversy about BB and Snuggli type carriers being bad for baby's pelvis/spine.

I also loved my co-sleeper until we put my son in his own room at 6 months. If you plan to nurse, borrowing a co-sleeper or basinet will save your sanity.

Bouncy seat was great. My kid hated the swing but lots like them. If space is tight you might consider borrowing one until you know if the little one likes it.

I hated the bottle warmer but then my kid wouldn't take one anyway, so maybe I just never learned to use it right. Also found the big travel system stroller utterly useless, your s&g is a wise choice.

The microwave sterilizer is awsome for pump parts (or bottles). The wipes are very helpful for traveling with no access to a microwave.

If you drive a lot, I'd get the car mirror thing that lets you see your rear facing child.

[Rebekah]

I never had a bouncy seat, but I know a lot of people who did and who swear by them. Personally, I would have been in trouble without my swing (a Fisher Price cradle-style swing). It saved my life ... and freed my hands up long enough to do some chores around the house. One feature I loved about ours was that it could swing in TWO directions ... side-to-side and back-and-forth. Some babies have a preference!

Although we've yet to have a baby in the City, I think a sling or Baby Bjorn is probably a must, especially when you're dealing with the subway. It will allow you to carry the baby AND a stroller, etc. up and down all the stairs more easily, AND allow you to keep the baby close to you when it gets a little crowded.

I saw that Brooklyn Mama recommended Boing Boing already. That is a GREAT store. If you're thinking about using a sling, it is THE place to go. They even have a sling class, where they help you pick the right sling for you, and show you how to put it on, etc. They're also an excellent resource for breastfeeding and pump info, lactation consultants, and even (eventually) ... PLAYGROUPS.

[jen]

You're taxing my brain, but defintely the Baby Bjorn. I know lots of people love the sling, but I just never got the hang of it. I was always afraid he was going to fall out.

As far as swing or bouncy--I have to say, get both. Because you're not going to know which one will work and the last thing you'll want to do is run out and get one, especially because you may be desparate to find something -- anything that will work right at that moment.

A very comfortable nursing bra. I'll have to look up the one I found with my second one--it was $50 but so worth it.

I loved the boppy pillow--for nursing for my first and for propping my second up.

Eventually, the exer-saucer thing. Very handy when you need to get a few things done.

[Sylvie]

I am fully unqualified to say since I don't have a baby or near-term intentions for one... however I do recall that my sister's sanity was truly saved in the early days of breast feeding (oh, loud, hungry baby, PLEASE LATCH ON!) with the purchase of the Boppy Pillow. One one question: why such ugly fabrics? We need a Kate Spade boppy.

[mijk]

If you're going to breastfeed this will save your clothes your bedlinnen and therefor your sanity.. They might not keep you dry the first week or two but do'nt through them away after that they are fantastic.. (and I must say they are the most minimilistic breastpads I know of...)

www.lilypadz.com

Mijk

[Anna]

Your Baby May Vary, of course, but so far (my daughter is 6 weeks), there are two 'extra' things that I couldn't live without:

1. The bouncy seat. She wouldn't sleep in her bassinet (she hated lying flat) when we first brought her home, so she slept in the bouncy seat. Now it's great because I can put her in it and set it in the doorway of the bathroom and have a shower. When you have a baby, a nice hot shower can be the highlight of the day.

2. My breastfeeding pillow. I had a really hard time positioning her in the hospital, but as soon as I got home and used the pillow, it became about a zillion times easier. I should have taken it to the hospital with me. Plus you can use it to prop the baby up for really cute pictures!

I also have a swing (borrowed from my SIL), and the baby does like it, but I could live without it.

[Anna]

Ahhhhh, can't believe I forgot the third thing - some sort of baby carrier! I have a Bjorn and I made myself a couple of slings (different fabrics - have to be fashionable, don't you know!). The baby likes both of them; I prefer the slings because they are so versatile. What kind of carrier you get is really a very personal decision, but I love mine (they're ring slings, which are really easy to make if you have a sewing machine and can stitch a straight line - you have to order the rings online - www.slingrings.com).

[Cat, Galloping]

You asked for it, you got it (but minimalist it is not!) My sister and her Upper East Side friends have passed around and edited this list. She swears to have used every last thing on here.

FURNITURE
Crib
Mattress
Changing Table
Vinyl Pad
Terry Cover
Drawers
Lamp
Diaper Pail - Diaper Genie w.Refills
Hamper
Glider Chair Nursing Stool (okay I never saw this one at her house, d'you think it's like for milking a cow?)
Crib Bedding
Bumper
Sheets
Waterproof Sheets
Quilted Pads

TRAVEL EQUIPMENT
Carriage/Stroller
Car Seat
Car Seat Frame Stroller
Baby Bjorn
Bottle Bag w. Cool Pack
Diaper Bag
Car Window Shades
RainCover
Stroller Sun Umbrella

HOME EQUIPMENT
Baby Monitor - Angelcare Sound/Breathing Sink Sponge Liner (use for newborn sink baths)
Evenflo newborn tub with comfort sling
Infant Swing - Graco Advantage w/ music
Graco Pack n' Play w/ bassinet
2 Pack n' Play sheets
2 Waterproof sheets

MUST-HAVE TOYS
Gymini Deluxe Playskool Kick-Start Gym Evenflo Ultra saucer
Boppy Tummy-time mat

MEALTIME EQUIPMENT
High Chair - Peg Perego Prima Pappa
Splat Mat
Bottles (try different kinds-Johnson's angled are BEST)
Bottle Brush
Nipple Brush
Dishwasher Basket for Nipples
Electric Breast Pump
Nursing Pads
Cotton Cloth Diapers (for burping)
Bottle Sterilizier (for 1st two months - Avent)

LAYETTE
6 Side Snap shirts - 3 month
5-10 Onesies w/snaps all the way down
4 Drawstring Gowns - 3 to 6 month
7 Stretchies - 3 and 6 month
1 Sweater with hat
6 Receiving Blankets
1 Heavier Stroller Blanket
3 Pairs Booties/ 3 Pairs socks
Summer or Winter
Snowsuit if Winter
4 Hooded Bath Towels/Wash Cloths
Cloth and Plastic Bibs Saks
1 Snuggly
1 Pair Cotton Mittens (prevents face scratching)

DRUG STORE
Comb & Brush
Baby Scissors/Clippers/File - First Years' Rectal Thermometer - Mercury (not digital) Nasal Saline Drops
Nasal Aspirator
Balmex
A & D Ointment
Vaseline
Cotton Balls
Q-Tips
Pampers Baby Wipes/Travel Wipe Holder
**Newborn Pacifiers - Mams Mini Ulti (if you use them these are the BEST)
Tylenol Liquid for Infants
Diapers - Pampers Premium with cut-out for Umbilical cord
Rubbing Alcohol
Gauze Pads (only if you have a boy)
Bacitracin (only if you have a boy)
Neosporin
Mylicon Drops for gas (nonstaining formula)- didn't really work for me
Johnson's Baby Shampoo
Johnson's Baby Lotion - pink
Johnson's Baby Wash
Laundry Detergent - Dreft
Night Light

HOSPITAL BAG - MOM
Nursing Gown (not necessary) Bathrobe (not necessary) Slippers Underwear Socks
Nursing Bras Nursing Pads
Menstrual Pads - HEAVY flow Camera
Shower Thongs
Toiletries/Soap
Pad and Pens
Money/Change for Vending
Lip Balm
Lollipops for Labor (if allowed)
Phone Number List
1 Towel
1 Pillow with colored case (don't forget this)
Going Home Clothes

HOSPITAL BAG - BABY
Side snap shirt
Stretchie
Receiving Blanket
Snuggly/Hat/Booties
Heavy Blanket
Cloth Diaper
Pampers Premium Newborn w/ cut-out for Umbilical cord
Car Seat to leave the Hospital

[Bridget]

I had every last thing recommended in Baby Bargains. I used maybe 1/3 of the stuff a lot, another small portion a little, and others none at all.

My daughter hated the swing, we used the pack and play 4 times, she hated the bouncer/swing you hook up in the door, blah, blah, blah.

My assvice - hold off on buying big ticket items like swings until the baby is born. Then take said baby to Babies-R-Us and test drive the swings and other equipment. Now, if you should happen to get it all as gifts, so much the better.

[Monica]

If someone would have told me to wait until Love Bug was born to see what he liked and didn't like, I wouldn't have listened, but you seem much more reasonable than me...so, seriously, it saves a lot of money to wait if you can. I really wanted both the swing and bouncy seat, but Love Bug detests the swing so it was a waste. The Fisher Price aquarium vibrating seat, however, saved my sanity and allowed me to take much-needed showers.

Other people have already mentioned a sling/baby bjorn and I definitely agree - I feel like I have the only baby in the world who hates being in his car seat/stroller, and I really don't know what I would do without my sling/baby bjorn. I have the Kangaroo Korner sling, which is great. The Baby Bjorn, while a bit uncomfortable for me, is my son's favorite. (By the way, you're going to be so happy you have the Snap and Go - it's so much easier!)

We've hardly used our pack and play either, but we've gotten great use out of the mini co-sleeper. It's smaller and easier to take places. We found that Love Bug wouldn't sleep in his crib until he was a few months old. I don't know if he prefers the co-sleeper because it's so much smaller, but it works for us.

Let's see...a mobile and gymini are great to have too.

I wouldn't stock up too much on lotions, ointments, etc... because your baby might be sensitive to certain brands. We went through a few different kinds before we found one Love Bug could tolerate.

[Amanda]

You MUST have a vibrating bouncy seat (and lots and lots of batteries... as to NEVER be without the vibration). Diaper Genie's suck, don't get one of those. Just save plastic grocery bags, they work just as well. Buy tons of cloth diapers to use as burp cloths (wash them a dozen times before use, so they will actually absorb). Buy several different kinds of pacifiers, your baby will choose the one he/she likes best.

[Laura]

We used our Pack N Play every day for the first 4 months with both girls.
Ours has the changing table and basinette inserts so it was permanently set up in our family room for easy changing and, more importantly, easy napping. Although we live in a 3-story house and when they were newborn, I was just paranoid enough to want to be on the same floor as they slept. Your mileage would vary based on house layout and paranoia level!

Bouncy seat and later the exersaucer are the only items that guaranteed a shower for me on any given day.

[Summer]

The best advice I got about baby furniture was this: don't get a high chair. They're too expensive, take up too much real estate, and are useful only for a short period of time. Instead, get a $25 feeding seat (Safety 1st makes one, but the one I've got is the First Years 4-Stage Feeding Seat). It straps onto a regular dining chair. It has a recline setting, so you can use it from birth as a safe place to strap down the baby as you eat (never tried this though, as I only bought the seat when the boy was ready to eat real food). It's got a tray - easy to remove, small enough to fit easily in the sink to wash - for use during the high-chair period, and when your baby hits toddlerhood, you take off the tray and use it as a booster seat. We've been using ours for more than two years now, and will likely get another year of use out of it. Because it straps onto a regular chair, you can unstrap it and haul the whole thing into the sink or bathtub to scrub, and you can also take it with you if you're dining at the home of someone with no baby equipment. (Though if you plan to do that often, get the Safety 1st Fold n' Go booster seat. The regular feeding chair doesn't fold, and though light is kinda bulky.)

The only other baby product I love enough to plug for free is our Maclaren stroller. As a city mama, I can attest that it's light, sturdy, and easy to maneuver around an urban landscape. It's also one of the few strollers that doesn't force a tall father into a painful stoop. Ours is still in great shape after more than 2 years of hard use. Worth the money, I'd say.

[Menita]

Without questin, almost before the diapers even, the bouncy chair, esp one that vibrates. CRUCIAL - not used for play in the first few weeks but essential (ESSENTIAL) for sleep - something about the vibrating action did it for Polly.
Thousands of cloth diapers (for burping, mopping, etc.). A+D or other such ointment (esp now that it's hot).
Target's cheap baby tub (the blue one with mesh - does wonders for my confidence bathing her - the mesh was great for her sponge baths the first ten days).
-A baby bjorn or similar carrier (sling, whatever).
-the avent sterilizer
-one of those plastic cage like things you can put bottle parts in and throw in the dishwasher. critical!
- large receiving blankets for swaddling
- the avent isis manual pump - regardless of whether you have an electric pump as well. it was recommended by friends over at my blog and i have to say thank goodness i got it.

[Moxie]

Baby Bargains isn't that applicable to the NYC lifestyle, because we don't have that much room.

I'd also say buy as you go, so you don't have to store stuiff you'll need in a few months. So don't buy another stroller now--wait until you've outgrown the car seat and then make your choice, based on what you've been observing in the baby's first few months of life.

Definitely you need a carrier. Ixnay on the Bjorn, big time. It's ridiculously expensive for how uncomfortable it is. I'd really recommend a wrap like the MobyWrap or Ellaroo. I'm loving my Ellaroo because it's really secure. Perfect for buses and subways and trains and walking a few miles. When the baby is a toddler you'll want a plain old ring sling like the MayaWrap because it's easy to get the kid in and out and in and out and in and out, but you don't need that now.

Avent Isis.

I hate my Maclaren with the white-hot intensity of a thousand suns, but some people love theirs, so again I say to wait until you really need the next stroller before you buy.

If someone wants to buy you the Stokke Kinderzeat, take them up on it. Otherwise get a feeding chair that straps onto a regular chair. Ours is still going strong after almost 3 years. But you won't need this for the first few months.

Neither of my kids has liked the bouncy seat, so I'll lend you mine if no one else gives you one. Don't buy a swing, either, since some kids don't like them--see if someone else will lend you one.

My Breast Friend. Someone will give you the Boppy. Smile and thank them, then return it for the MBF. Your nipples will thank you.

Blankets, clothes, diapers, blah blah blah. Don't buy too much in 0-3 months, because a bigger baby (which you might have--I had no idea I was cooking a 9.5-pounder) will grow out of that size in a few weeks.

I'm also a big fan of having the baby in with you for at least the first few months so you get more sleep, but that's just my (lazy) preference. I like the co-sleeper because then when the baby's in bed with us the cat has someplace to sleep.

If I think of anything else I'll post.

[ali]

bouncy chair.
the fisher price one that virates and lights up. i couldn't have lived without it!

[Jessica]

Here are my city baby/very little space in your house tips:

Summer is right--don't get a high chair. get a plastic feeding seat. They take up much less space and are so much easier to clean!

Leacho Safer Bather instead of a baby bathtub. Cheaper, easier and takes up no space because you just wring it out and hang it up on the shower rod or by the shower head.

Don't even think about another stroller until your baby has outgrown the snap and go. Then, go to the store and test drive the lightweight, easy-fold, sturdy strollers. Lots of people love Maclaren. We have a Combi that we love. We also have an inexpensive umbrella stoller for travelling.

Get a collapsable exersaucer eventually (it will keep the baby occupied while you cook, bathe, etc), but wait until the baby is about 6 months because the baby can't use it right away and it takes up a ton of space. By that time you will be done witht he bouncy seat/swing and you can put the exersaucer where you used to keep them.

We received a bouncy seat as a shower gift, which was handy right away because she did like it. However lots of babies don't and it does take up space. So if you can borrow one first, I would do that. Or wait a few weeks and take the baby to the store to "test drive" bouncy seats and swings. We got the fold-up Fisher Price swing for space reasons after such a test drive when she was 2 months old.

ISIS breast pump.

Advent microwave sterilizer.

Fisher Price Aqurium Crib Toy (lasts much longer than a mobile because it is still safe when they learn to sit and pull up).

Some type of baby bjorn/sling type of carrier. Different babies/parents like different kinds. If possible, I would borrow or test drive a few different types before actually buying one. Have your husband try them too. We were very happy with the Bjorn. My husband wouldn't even consider using a sling and I never really got the hang of it, but it is all about personal preference.

When the baby is older--NUBY sippy cups, bumpkins bibs.

Things that I got but either hated or never used: diaper genie (too complicated), bottle warmer, boppy pillow, mobile, baby bath tub, and a highchair.

I love your Pottery Barn bedding! As for your crib, the Pottery Barn cribs are made by Simmons. The designs are not unique to Pottery Barn, and they are carried by different stores. If you look, you can find their same cribs at Babies R Us and other stores. We've been very happy with the quality of ours. I bought a Delta changing table because I didn't think it needed to be as sturdy. It is a little flimsy, but it's held up ok.

[christarenee]

A & D. It's the best. Buy a big ol' tub.

Also, a tip for diaper changing and rash-aviodance: After an early bout with a really bad diaper rash, we started using a cup or two of water mixed with a tablespoon of distilled white vinegar -- we dip a washcloth in and wipe away, unless it's #2, then we use a paper towel in the same solution. He just turned 6 months old and hasn't had any rash AT ALL since he was 3 weeks old! And, it got rid of that initial rash MUCH faster than the expensive ointments his pediatrician prescribed.

Also, a hairdryer to blow-dry the butt area after wiping. Seriously. Babies love it. They love the white noise and the warmth on the nether regions must feel great. My baby would stop crying instantly when we turned it on. Just make sure to use the low setting and/or buy one that isn't super loud. And, like the vinegar, it helps avoid the dreaded rash by keeping that area nice and dry.

And, final item: Lanolin for your nipples, if you breastfeed. God. Send.

[Becki]

I could not have lived without a bouncy seat and a Baby Bjorn. I was intimidated by slings, though I'm told they're quite easy to use.I also found the cloth diapers enormously helpful with my son, who would vomit on you as soon as look at you. Thank God he's gotten over that, at least until he's a teenager.

[beaver girl]

Instead of writing the same thing on my blog - I'm going to cheat and link here and use your commenters advice. I hope that's ok with you and everyone.

[Brooklyn Girl]

Beaver Girl--More than okay. Also, Grrl has a crib sheet (so to speak) of advice up at her place:

http://chezmiscarriage.blogs.com/chezmiscarriage/2005/06/sorry.html

Thanks to everyone who's commented so far!

[mama-bean]

Some advice from me.... I had decided on what bottles I would use for pumped milk EARLY on in my pregnancy, and now own at least $200 in Avent products... and my now 8 month old daughter refuses to eat from them. SHE prefers Playtex.... and now so do I. ( with the "bags" that the milk goes in, she doesn't have to tip the bottle up to feed herself...nice!)

Also, she LOVED her rocking-vibrating seat ( got it at Target). She slept in that ( when she wasn't in bed with me) for the first 3 months of her life, and sat in it and played whenever I made dinner, etc. She Still loves to rock in it now at 8 months. Plus, it's very portable, so if you travel at all it's easy to bring with, which is hard to do with a swing.
2nd most necessary.. the Baby Bjorn front-pack. Spend the extra money. We started out with a cheap one, and it was SO umcomfortable! BUT, we didn't even realize how bad it was till we tried the BB. There were times she was so upset as a tiny baby, the only thing we could think to do was strap her on, hug a nice fluffy blanket to her, and take a walk. NEVER failed.. she'd fall right asleep.
Everything else is just extras in those first weeks. She was never in her crib till at least 6 weeks old, didn't know what a toy was till around 5 months.
For selfish reasons, I say DO invest in a nice dresser drawer set. It is so nice to open those drawers and see all those tiny clothes all lined up nice and neat!
In the end, if you have loving arms and diapers, you're all set.

[Sarah L]

swaddling blanket has been very popular in many a home.
Sarah

[brooklynbabe]

I second the sling from Kangaroo Korner. Check out their fleece pouch for once it gets cooler (HA! Hard to imagine right now I know...) It made a big difference in getting out as I didn't have to put as many layers on the babe.

Also perhaps a class card to Park Slope Yoga Center? The Mommy/Baby yoga classes are a really nice way to get out of the house and Sasha, the teacher, will walk fussy babes around so you can do some yoga, or stretch or nap-whatever you want.

Best Wishes-
Brooklynbabe

[Lindsey]

If you'll notice, not one person has mentioned a Diaper Genie. Skip those things, they are total crap. All the other pseudo-Diaper Genies are crap too.

Get a good old fashioned diaper pail with a TIGHT lid. Also, they have these little scented bags you can tie the diapers in before you throw them away, those help a little too.

[lisa]

Lots and LOTS of D batteries. Especially if you get the swing/bouncer/etc.

We got the Bumbo Seat instead of a high chair. It's great, lightweight and pretty small, plus it's multipurpose.

I bought a Bjorn on eBay for $25, and T and my husband both love it. I like it okay, too.

You don't really need a lot in the beginning, honestly. I should know, what with having hardly anything when mine was born 2 months premature. Even though he was in the hospital for 12 days, when he came home we were still scrambling (as in, the nursery was still a storage room and we had a single package of diapers).

So hold off on anything you don't definitely need in the first 3 months (again, unless other people are buying for you!) and check out consignment shops and the like for swings and exersaucers and whatnot later on. By then too, you'll probably be involved in LLL or some kind of mommy group and can get stuff secondhand for cheap. That way if baby doesn't like it you don't feel like you just wasted a ton of cash.

[SusieJ]

Loves:

Aquarium bouncy seat (but only after two months)

Play mat (after two months) We have the Tiny Love

Mobiles (after a month -- do you see a trend? He was kind of lumpish that first month)

Carrier: we have a Bjorn, borrowed the sling late and never got the hang of it, but even the front carrier could get him to sleep.

Graco travel swing (cheaper, smaller) with the play bar and dangly toys (I think it's the toys)

Soft rattles he can grab and chew (after three months)

Jangly plastic rings and keys (they go in the dishwasher!)

Gerber nippes: they are shorter; others were too long for his mouth. You will try a lot of nipples and bottles.

"Head-shoulders-knees-and-toes-knees-and-toes." And so do I, because he laughs! Singing, bouncing, dancing.

Going out! After four or six weeks, get out every day. I was happy to take over grocery shopping because he loved the outing!

Dislikes:
Expensive Graco swing without toy bar. Bought it too late at 3 1/2 months? Has no toy bar? Dunno, but he CRIES most of the time.

And even Mr. 7 1/2 pounds, no weight gain the first two weeks was out of 0 to 3 months by 6 weeks of age. Carter's sizes tend to run larger, Osh Kosh smaller.

What you NEED for breastfeeding:
Soothies (TM) These are 3" diameter gel nursing pads that are FANTASTIC for cracked nipples. $11/pair, but you won't need that many pairs.

A HIGH BACK on the glider/rocker, so that when you fall asleep in the chair for two hours, you don't wake with a crick. I've had to push my head up off the chair with a hand.

Lanolin.

Gerber makes "ice packs" for painful breasts. They are 6 or 7 inches diameter, with a hole for the nipple, and can be nuked or frozen.

Washable nursing pads.

Ameda Purely Yours is a nice pump.

Most important: husband support. My husband (on advice of the lactation consultant) helped correct our latch by gently pulling the baby's mouth REALLY WIDE and then popping him on. Looked funny as all get out, but it worked.

Finally, borrow everything you can. Kid doesn't like it or outgrows it, who cares?

Want a swing?

Good luck. In those dark, dark moments, remember that billions of women have been in the same place, and we all got through it, and you will too. (Don't mean to scare you, but those first months have some dark places, but they go away.)

--SJ

[Rebekah]

Just wanted to offer you the use of our swing, if you'd like. That way you won't have "flushed" your money if the baby doesn't like it. =)

[corky]

I wished I had bought so much less than I did since our son outgrew or hated some of the big ticket items. Beg or borrow as much as you can because you'll be storing a ton of bulky baby stuff after he's outgrown it. Some of it was quite useful in their time but after they were outgrown they've become very expensive dust collectors. Check out consignment shops that have baby items. I have bought many many designer clothes for my son for a fraction of the cost of a new wardrobe AND since most babies outgrow their clothes quickly the clothes were often pristine. A good consignment shop will have good strollers,carriers and have a mixture of new things.

I have to admit I got sucked into the whole thing about getting the latest and greatest since *gasp* I may be hindering my son's chances of developing intellectually if I didn't get the latest mobile or toy. It doesn't matter, you are the best 'development' toy for your baby. Check out 'Einstein didn't use flask cards'

A few things I found indispensible:

The avent steriliser. I have bother microwave and electric. I use the electric one most and I use the disposable Medela bags when I travel. I would hold off on a pump until you see how the breastfeeding goes. You want a really good pump at the beginning to get your supply up and to maintain it and you can rent the medela symphony (a wonderful pump) at dealers . I bought the Avent pump but I ended up having to pump fulltime (for 2 years, crazy I know) and I never used it since I then invested in a a double electric pump.

I agree with the 'My breast friend pillow'. Way better support for the baby which will give you a better latch and you can use it hands free!

I liked the bouncy chair but buy some baby einstein videos so you can play some captivating video, place your baby in the seat and TAKE A SHOWER...that's what I did.

I really like our Stokke Kinderzeat. I got our relatively cheaply at equipmentshop.com I think.

We used the Ambly baby hammock for the first 8 months..although we kept the baby by our bed in a large sterilite container for the first month (the 'tupperware kept him fresh). He really liked the hammock and it did seem to help him sleep.

I also got the set of signing time videos and got the Sign to your baby book by Garcia. I taught sign language to Jett, my son, early on...mainly because it was fun seeing him sign and it was great for him to communicate long before he could talk. He didn't talk until quite late so the signing really helped bridge that gap between toddlerhood and screaming tantrums. He still had his share but at least I had a chance of understanding what he was thinking. This is just a thought.

Other than that, play it by ear. I didn't buy too many newborn clothes since I had read that they can grow so quickly, what I did not count on was having a baby that had trouble thriving because of breastfeeding problems and therefore needing lots of little newborn things since he stubbornly refused to grow for many months. He's fine now, a very skinny, tall toddler.

Hope my tome is helpful

corky

[mama-bean]

One more bit of advice.. if you DO get a diaper disposer, get the Diaper Champ-- easy to use, blocks most of the odor, uses regular garbage bags ( although I buy the scented ones)
Now, nothing is gonna keep all the smell in, but here's a trick that's worked for me.. At my local dollar store they sell these tiny boxes of 100 doggie doo disposal bags. I keep one in the diaper bag and one under the changing table. When a poo diaper is presented, I wrap it up in the doggie doo bag and tie the top before disposing of it. Keeps the smell locked tight in, plus the box is SO SMALL so it can easily be hidden anywhere. I have them all over.. in the car, Grammas house, etc.
Can't find them in the store nearest you? e-mail me and I'll ship you some.

[Linda]

Sorry, I don't have time to read everyone else's thoughts so take mine for what they're worth.

I love my fake high chairs. They snap on to a regular dining room chair and take up much less room. I just spent 2 days hauling them back and forth to my mom's house. It was much easier than moving 2 full sized high chairs.

We borrowed bouncy seats and swings from people and both our girls liked both of them. One of the swings we borrowed was a big fancy one with a little light and sea creatures that went around the light. I just looked it up; it's called the Ocean Wonders Aquarium Swing. There was a large chunk of time that E took all her daytime naps in that swing. We loved it. Whatever bouncy seats/swings you get, make sure the covers are EASY to take off, wash, and put back on. Your kid will poop/puke in there.

Don't buy any baby clothes yourself. People will buy you clothes, even after the birth. You may end up needing to buy a few onesies, but I was amazed at the massive amount of clothes we were given.

A co-sleeper is a good thing. I found myself popping up regularly just to make sure my 2 still existed and were alive. Of course, I probably would have lost a ton of weight running down the hall to their room every 5 minutes during the night. Anyway, we didn't actually buy a co-sleeper, but we took the siderail off a crib and bungy-corded it to our bed. When they started rolling, we put the rail back on and just kept the crib next to our bed. It was very convenient for middle of the night feedings and comfortings.

If you're intererested, I did do a post on my own assvice recently: http://indigogirl.typepad.com/linda/2005/05/my_own_personal.html

[Melanie]

My twins are 12 weeks today & I'm loving this stuff:
miracle blanket
happiest baby on the block book
boppy
glamourmom tank bra
new native type sling
microwave sterilizer bags
Zutano clothes
swing/bouncy chair

[Tara]

In this great city (NYC) a MacClaren is a must it folds up small, fast and easy. It is light weight and can does not take up a lot of space. Also, a exe-saucer!

[Christine]

The miracle blanket is the one thing I probably wouldn't ever give up.

We use the swing for calming, the bouncy seat for hanging while we eat, I shower, etc. and I like having both.

I love the Bjorn. We just started turning him around so he can see and he is In. Heaven.

We bought a battery recharger for $20 and some rechargeables. I suspect it's saving us a fortune.

We're using cloth wipes and homemade solution, because we did have diaper rash with some brands of wipes. These are really soft and clean better. Love them.

Your bedding...adorable.

[Anna]

Oh, here's another thought - I highly reccommend a backpack style diaper bag. Not the most stylish, but when you are carting the baby around solo, it's invaluable to have both hands free. Plus my husband will not carry the shoulder bag; he'll only carry the backpack (rolling my eyes now).

[Heather]

Like the bedding - I offered my husband two choices, alph. soup animals or under the sea. Being a beach nut, he chose under the sea (we know it is a boy.)

I NEVER thought I would be buying nursery bedding from Pottery Barn! I have given into to the silliness of babyhood!

[Lola]

We got the same PB nursery bedding that you chose, and were really impressed with how nice it all was when we actually put it in the crib a few days ago. The sheets are great quality (and super soft), and the bumpers lay nice and flat against the sides of the crib (instead of gaping or collapsing easily like others I've looked at.)

If you're an organizational nut like me, you may want to also consider getting some bins and/or baskets to organize all the clothes and miscellany. We live in a fairly small urban condo (with pretty limited closet/storage space), and I'm really glad I invested in some of the PB collapsing canvas bins and the organizer that you hang over the back of a door. I know they've definitely made getting organized a little bit easier for me. Target also has similar stuff available on their website.

Good Luck!

[Jess]

I would also recommend the miracle blanket. www.miracleblanket.com
For such a cheesy name it actually works as promised.

[Rayne of Terror]

Tiny Love Gymini. My son has been playing in it since he was 2 weeks old and now he's 5 months. In fact he's rolling around in it swatting at the monkey right now.

For us the swing was more valuable than the bouncy seat. Some nights we had to leave him in there to get some shut eye ourselves.

We have 6 thick cloth diapers and 6 thin cloth diapers and that is plenty if you have your own washing machine.

We got the Childcraft crib suggested in Baby Bargains from Burlington Coat Factory online and have been very pleased with it. I think it was $250 and is very nice for the price. I love the storage drawer underneath.

I have an ultimate crib sheet which snaps on top of the linens and can tossed in the washer without having to unmake the whole crib. That's nice, but since we've never had a terrible blow out or vomiting episode it hasn't been the be all and end all.

I have used regular bed pillows for nursing with no trouble.

We returned our Diaper Dekor after a couple weeks b/c it was chintzy and operating the bag was more trouble that it was worth. Didn't hold very many diapers and he was a newborn! We got a Simple Human 30 liter stainless steel step can for the same price. It holds a weeks worth of diapers with nary a wisp of odor. Once we're done using it in the baby's room it could be used anywhere in the house.

We have a Graco Quattro which is Consumer Reports #1 stroller. (ranked higher than both $750 strollers) It is too damn big. I hit stuff with it all the time. A lot of the time I just take the Bjorn instead.

[Heidi]

I'll be honest, I asked advice like this on my blog back when I was expecting my first and it ended up making things MORE confusing rather than helping. You have some people who LOVE their stroller/carseat combo and others who hate it. You have some people who swear by a sling and don't like the Baby Bjorn and others who love it.

I think the BEST advice I can give you is DO NOT BUY MOST OF THIS STUFF NEW!!! It's a waste of your money. I swear!!! Look at Ebay or better yet craigslist.com and buy a used swing, bouncy seat, exersaucer, Baby Bjorn, sling, stroller, etc. I could KICK myself that I bought some things new (fortunately I bought a lot 2nd hand because we were REALLY tight for cash when I was expecting) when I could have saved a lot of money and even had NICER things for less!!

The thing is that babys only stay infants for a short time. You only use a Baby Bjorn or a swing for a limited amount of time. Even if you use it ALL the time, it's not going to get "beat up" and pretty much everything is machine washable.

My youngest is now a year old. Chances are we will not be having any more children, I am now selling all my baby stuff and it is in practically NEW condition. I might not be "this years" model, but ultimately it doesn't matter to the infant and the savings buying 2nd hand are worth it.

I cannot express this enough, DO NOT BUY A BRAND NEW SWING. Your child might HATE being in the swing. I hear ALL the time that someone spent over $100 for a swing their child never used. You can open ANY newspaper and find a practically new swing for 1/2 the price of a new one. This also goes for other things, but in my experience swings tend to be one of those things people regret spending money on the most.

I'd say buy new for a few things that really matter to you and do a little research for the rest. You might want to purchase a brand new car seat (and I also loved the "Bundle Me" cover for the car seat for both my children -- what a convenient and useful item....I also give it as gift when I go to showers and it's always appreciated) and a few other items, but seriously see if you can borrow or buy a used swing, bouncy seat, playmat, pack-n-play, etc.

My only other piece of "advice" is to get a LIGHT stroller. The lighter the better, I swear. You will thank me each time you fold that baby up and put it in your car. I didn't even get a stroller (I used a Bjorn or sling a LOT while I could) till later and by then I had already learned from the other moms in my playgroup that when it comes to strollers that lighter was better. I got a cheap, light Graco model and I still LOVE that one. I since have bought a twin MacClearen (sp?) which is great for two children, but if I only have to take one child out, I go for my cheap Graco every time!

As for the Diaper Genie/Champ, wipe warmer, diaper cady, bottle warmers, high chairs (I'd encourage you to go for one of those that attach to a regular chair, much cheaper, take up less room and work jus as well), etc etc I'd say skim them. You won't need them. I've raised two children without and never saw a need for them.

DO get lots of cloth diapers for spit cloths. As an added bonus, their great for cleaning with/wiping up spills when you child doesn't need them anymore. My mom still buys them for cleaning to this day. :-)

Sorry I wrote so long, but I just find that when you go to one of those stores or look at those lists for what you need, you could probably cross half of it off and buy the rest used and still get name brand, high quality stuff. Use the money you save to put it in your child's college fund or take a nice trip together. You'll get more out of it then a diaper genie or wipe warmer that you only use for a short time.

*hugs*

[Leah]

1st off, Congratulations!
Now back to business :)
You NEED one of those vibrating chairs!!! It saved my life...and my sons ;)
(it turned out to be our saving grace when my son was about 1 month old)
Baby Einstein videos are great from about 4 weeks (while sitting in the chair) and up. My son still loves them and he is 15 months.
What else...a baby bjorn front carrier is awesome because 1)you can have your hands free 2)baby is still being carried around and bounced!
Good Luck!

[luckymom]

There are just a few things that I would recommend b/c we seemed to get the most use for the longest time. The boppy was the best, especially for BF. My 10 month old will sometimes rest on it when she is feeding herself her bottle. She used the einsten play mat thing (?) from birth until about 7 months. I changed her on a bed, so she could be under it while I changed her. She loved it. I put it up a couple of months ago b/c she's not on her back much but she still plays with the toys that were attached to it. I also love the hooded towels from pottery barn. They are thicker and bigger than most and I'm still using them at 10 months.

I loved the Graco Snugride for an infant carrier and the Britax Roundabout is a great carseat and can be used from birth to 40lbs (nice, if you don't use a carrier). I do not like my Maclaren at all. I have the quest. It's lightweight and easy to use but my kid hates it. She's just not comfortable in it. I have a Zooper Zyldeco for walking around the neighborhood and she loves it but it's a bit heavy to lift in and out of the car. I'm still working to find a good "mall" stroller for her. I think something that has a tray and fully reclines would be better.

As far as High chairs go, I have a Fisher Price highchair that I love. I ordered it over at BRUS.com. It's tan and black so it kind of blends in with our furniture and it is so functional. I started putting my baby in it when she was 3 1/2 months and she seems to like it a lot. It reclines so you can put you kid in it a bit earlier than some of the other high chairs. She didn't eat in it at 3 1/2 months but it just was a good place for her to be where she could see me why I was cooking dinner.

If you don't have the space for a high chair, the fisher price healthy care booster chair that you strapped to a regular chair is great and it's only like $ 25. I bought it for my baby to use at my mom's house. You can't use it as soon as the high chair, but once they are eating foods (4-6 months) it works just fine.

I think bouncy seats, exersaucers, swings, jumpers, etc. are iffy b/c you just don't know what your kid is going to like. I would try to get hand-me downs from friends b/c you just don't use them very long. I have a spare bed room full of that stuff. I will say of all, she did sleep in her swing ALOT for the first couple of months.

One last thing. Target has these blankets from Amy Coe. They are kind of a chennile (sp?) cable knit. The only cost $ 17 bucks and they come in pink, green and blue. I have three of them and can honestly say that I have used one of them every day since she has been born. They are great to swaddle, cuddle, use as stroller blankets or floor mats. I received a "barefoot dreams" chennile blanket for a shower gift that cost $ 80 that is very nice but can't compare to the AC target blanket. I buy every new mom I know one of these.

Good Luck!

[luckymom]

There are just a few things that I would recommend b/c we seemed to get the most use from them for the longest time. The boppy was the best, especially for BF. My 10 month old will sometimes rest on it when she is feeding herself her bottle. She used the einstein play mat thing (?) from birth until about 7 months. I changed her on a bed, so she could be under it while I changed her. She loved it. I put it up a couple of months ago b/c she's not on her back much but she still plays with the toys that were attached to it. I also love the hooded towels from pottery barn. They are thicker and bigger than most and I'm still using them at 10 months.

I loved the Graco Snugride for an infant carrier and the Britax Roundabout is a great carseat and can be used from birth to 40lbs (nice, if you don't use a carrier). I do not like my Maclaren at all. I have the quest. It's lightweight and easy to use but my kid hates it. She's just not comfortable in it. I have a Zooper Zyldeco for walking around the neighborhood and she loves it but it's a bit heavy to lift in and out of the car. I'm still working to find a good "mall" stroller for her. I think something that has a tray and fully reclines would be better.

As far as High chairs go, I have a Fisher Price highchair that I love. I ordered it over at BRUS.com. It's tan and black so it kind of blends in with our furniture and it is so functional. I started putting my baby in it when she was 3 1/2 months and she seems to like it a lot. It reclines so you can put you kid in it a bit earlier than some of the other high chairs. She didn't eat in it at 3 1/2 months but it just was a good place for her to be where she could see me why I was cooking dinner.

If you don't have the space for a high chair, the fisher price healthy care booster chair that you strapped to a regular chair is great and it's only like $ 25. I bought it for my baby to use at my mom's house. You can't use it as soon as the high chair, but once they are eating foods (4-6 months) it works just fine.

I think bouncy seats, exersaucers, swings, jumpers, etc. are iffy b/c you just don't know what your kid is going to like. I would try to get hand-me downs from friends b/c you just don't use them very long. I have a spare bed room full of that stuff. I will say of all, she did sleep in her swing ALOT for the first couple of months.

One last thing. Target has these blankets from Amy Coe. They are kind of a chennile (sp?) cable knit. The only cost $ 17 bucks and they come in pink, green and blue. I have three of them and can honestly say that I have used one of them every day since she has been born. They are great to swaddle, cuddle, use as stroller blankets or floor mats. I received a "barefoot dreams" chennile blanket for a shower gift that cost $ 80 that is very nice but can't compare to the AC target blanket. I buy every new mom I know one of these.

Good Luck!

[dale]

A big, belated CONGRATULATIONS!
I followed your link from SM,and your various topics caught my eye.Charlie is Beautiful! I truly laughed out-loud when I read your breastfeeding stories. The difficulty of an early delivery and a premie are something I know about all to well. My daughter Cara was born 12 weeks premature-I had preeclampsia,weighing 2lbs.6oz.
She was 3 weeks old weighed 1lb 13oz and developed NEC(necrotizing enterocolitis) which caused her bowel to perforate,nessitating a small bowel resection. It was a slow uphill climb at first,but gradually less steep.This was now 18 years ago,and through each phase of childhood my daughter has been an endless joy and inspiration to me.Today she is lovely,happy(apart from ususal teenage angst)and brilliant(GPA 3.9)This leads me back to why I wanted to write to you....I don't know much about "snugglies",Zooper Zyldecos,or miracle blankets. My advise is to try and relax about the many things that seem critical-but aren't,play and be happy. I am sure Charlie is a blessing.

[paige s.]

I wasn't too sure where I should post my map. Hope folks like it. I think this map is pretty neat personally.
I made a map that most parents can enjoy. It shows the best sledding hills + hot cocoa spots:
http://www.platial.com/system/map/1589+1592

Platial.com is a free, social, collaborative atlas--a place for
everyone to share information about their favorite places. You and your friends can add your sledding spots and coffee houses to my map or comment on the places I've already written about. Maybe you have an idea for a whole new map of your own!
We just launched the site, so your feedback and insights are precious to us. It's an ongoing labor of love and we'll need your feedback. If you have any questions or comments at all, please write!

Happy Sledding,
Paige
[email protected]