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Cat, Galloping

Oooh ooh, all of those, plus:

- A vaginal delivery worsening my vulvadynia, making sex and even wearing pants impossible. Forever.

- A c-section causing some kind of c-section problem that I'm unwilling to even research.

- Having to tell the whole world (you know, the non-blog world) that I had a c-section because I have a history of unexplained vulvar pain.

- Having a c-section by Dr. Barbie, a not even medical doctor (D.O.) who is part of my OB's practice

- Baby having any number of physical or mental ailments

- Baby dying at the age of 5, all in one night, from strep throat, as happened to an acquaintances kid recently.

- Baby getting hit by a car or kidnapped or falling down the stairs...

- My mother driving me bananas about the kid the way she does about the cat. (Personally, I didn't feel that her screeching at the cats was a more effective way to get them to stop fighting than, say, my gentle words and petting.)

- My sister's husband getting a job that will move them a plane ride away.

- My sister's husband NOT getting the job.

- The fact that the cat has taken up pooping on the floor of the baby-to-be's room.

- The Supreme Court and the likely loss of our right to choose, not just abortion, but maybe even birth control

- Getting into a car accident that kills the baby-- before he's born or after

- My husband growing to resent me and baby and feel that I forced him into this whole life in the suburbs, and near my family, not his

- Not being able to lose the baby weight

Ninotchka

32 weeks with my 3rd and at the top of my list is:

- $$$$

Followed by:

- (possibly) returning to work

Followed by:

- WILL I EVER HAVE A LIFE AGAIN????

Lord help us all!

Menita

Ah I used to worry about stillbirth a lot. Try not to. It's rare, and you are getting very good care.

Congenital kidney abnormalities (because of the SUA). Got nothing for you there.

Vaginal delivery. Sure you've heard this before but...I am SUCH an authority on this. It is the most godawful thing EVER while you are in the final stages, no way to sugarcoat it, but amnesia sets in almost immediately. And recovery is crazy quick (considering what you just pushed out). Epidural a must.

C-section. No help here.

Having my water break in a public place, like say, the subway: Ehhhh. Give them something to talk about.

Going into labor spontaneously
Not going into labor spontaneously : Same as the vaginal delivery item. Amnesia is a great, and quick thing. Either way, you're going to have to go through one or the other so...charge ahead.

The soap scum that will not come off the shower doors: OK, have you tried vinegar? Hot? Will smell DISGUSTING while you are rubbing it on but it does help.

Figuring out when my family will come visit: Ah. The first weeks are so, so hard. And it's a fine line. You need all the help you can get just to keep yourself fed. But...if you're trying to BF, like I was, and like Julie was, having relatives permanently hovering in the office is KILLER.

Being a terrible mother: You are planning to love this kid, right? You are? Then nuff said. You have fulfilled the only requirement that matters to be a good mother. The rest will come. Nobody else has a clue. And you know what? It's amazing how, at the end of the day, you WILL know your baby better than anyone else, even Dr. Spock.

Going back to work: Ah. When you figure out this one let me know. I went back three weeks ago and...Ah.

Danae: I know, I'm very worried about her too. And I think I read that she would be doing the updates on Grrrl's baby? That's got to be rough. But then again, both she and Grrl are pretty amazing and resilient.

Not going out to drink too many margaritas and coming home to have loud, sloppy sex for a long, long time: Ummmm....margaritas will happen sooner than you think. A little margarita making its way into your breastmilk will be quite something. Trust me on this one. The sex however...we waited 6 weeks and it hurt like hell. After 3 times it got great again, though.

The Yankees' pitching rotation: I hope it SUCKS because the Phillies need wins.

Breastfeeding: BWAAAAAAAAAAA (bawling). Refer to Moxie on this one.

The fickle wireless router: Do you use XP? Because we do and apparently some routers get all silly with XP after a while. You might want to check it out - we changed ours and now all is well.

$$$$$: Yep.

Karl Rove: ARRRRGH!!!! Yep.

Answering the question "Where do babies come from?" : "Many places. You came from a dish."

The weather--is this global warming or what? : Probably. And we are all going to die and Kyoto still isn't ratified and what are these people thinking.

Grocery shopping in NYC with an infant: Done it in Philly with same. It's...fun?

College tuition: Argh.

Adama, Starbuck, and the Arrow of Apollo: Indeed. Adama was so wise.

(That including the preceding items makes me the biggest nerd of all time): Mmmmmm...yes. I keep my BG fixation firmly in the closet.

Gefilte: Yep. Wish someone would post something already!

John G. Roberts: OMG yes!!!

Cat

You can always wear adult diapers for the next few weeks that should eliminate the fear of breaking water in a public place. Not to mention the lovely heat rash it may give you. (OK now I'm snickering at the thought of you wearing Depends... evil.)

Brooklyn Mama

Oh, I know. I know! Welcome to parenthood. It's amazing, but oh, man, what sleepless nights.

Moxie

Only like 10% of women break their water before labor starts. You'll probably already be at the hospital when your water breaks.

My advice for labor is to walk around as long as possible and then give birth on the toilet, but that's just me. I do think that you'll end up with a better outcome if you can stay upright as long as possible. Hold out as long as you can before you get the epidural (I'm assuming you're going to get one because you've never mentioned wanting to go drug-free) because as soon as you're on your back in the bed you lose the advantage of gravity to bring the kid down. It's lots easier to push when the baby's head is already there when you start.

Did I ever mention that I was completely terrified during the last few months of my pregnancy with El Chico that someone was going to stab me in the stomach? I thought that someone with hatred of pregnant women would rush up and stab my stomach, or, alternately, that I'd end up in the middle of a knife fight in the subway. I still can't walk down a specific block in my neighborhood without thinking of it.

Now I'm afraid we won't be able to make all our preschool tuition payments, that Roberts will be confirmed, and that my boys will be kidnapped. Normal fears, IMO.

KellyH

Lurker here. . . I'm 2 weeks post-partum with my second daughter, who was born via c-section. Don't fear the c-section too much. I had a vaginal delivery with my first and had complications (lightning quick delivery, baby in distress, 3rd degree episiotomy/torn extension, completely fractured tailbone)and a god-awful recovery, and although I had major surgery this time around, it's been waaay better.

I hope you have the birth you want- I'm rooting for you all they way. But don't let too many people scare you about having a section. It will be okay if you do have one.

Rae

My water broke in public, and it was fine. It really wasn't until I sat down on a toilet that I had the gush... and then I just packed a wad of t.p. in my panties and we were off. Compared to mothering, that was nuthin'.

I agree with KellyH - don't fret the c-section. If it happens, it's because it needs to - and it really isn't bad.

Wavery

That this comment will never do justice to exactly how much I find this post helpful to me.

Nors

Ditto on what Wavery said. PS. The hardest part of being pregnant during the summer, no margaritas.

Moxie

Oh, also, your real fear should be that you admitted to the whole internet that you saw that shark movie.

(Grocery shopping with a stroller = piece of cake.)

Brooklyn Girl

Moxie--If you and Cecily saw that bad movie too, then I feel I'm in good company.

grumpygirl

your hilarious post only furthers my acceptance about the fact that i likely won't be having kids. (not trying, no partner, just a decision i came to as i edge toward 40...)

but, i already have so many other things keeping me awake at night, that the last thing i can imagine is having to worry about actual important real-life things. (other than rove and the supreme court and roe, which i will always worry about.)

Moxie

See, but I never saw it. I just remembered the plot from the trailers, because it's the kind of plot that just makes you wonder why any idiot would go down underwater to train sharks anyway.

Of course now I probably will have to rent it. Which wouldn't be the worst, since I've loved LL since I was 15.

Shamhat

I spent my third pregnancy in fear that my air bag would be set off by a minor tap and blow the placenta right off of my uterus--my belly touched the steering wheel by about the 6th month. I actually had a stillbirth that was most likely caused by toxoplasmosis from the rabbit I got during the first trimester. Go figure.

As for shopping in NYC, once the baby is old enough for a stroller you'll love it. Giving up the stroller when the youngest got to be about 4 meant having to carry the bags again.

Brooklyn Mama

I saw . . . the movie . . . too. (Blush)

Heather

Makes me feel better that I am not the only one with night-fears. Mine hit after I get up to use the bathroom. Topics include:

Labor and delivery - too many to even list.

How will the cats, our "kids" for 12 years, react to this life change?

Will the same "kids" rub their potentially toxo-ladened buts on my face while I sleep? (We have all been tested and all are negatitive but that is prenancy insanity for you)

$$$$ - many variations on this worry

Sleep, as in will I ever sleep for more than 3 hours at a time (haven't since I found out I was pregnant)

SIDS and every other baby or fetal death concern imaginable.

The nice thing is at 30 weeks, the baby does a little tossing and turning after I lay back down, which I find comforting.

Anne

Vaginal delivery, along the lines of tearing or getting cut

C-Section – it’s the implications of WHY I’d need a C-Section that scare me

High Blood Pressure and/or preeclampsia, I’ve already had one small scare (the result of eating too much salt)

The dust that is accumulating everywhere that would require me to bend over in order to clean it

Going back to work

Not going back to work

Paying my bills

Turing into my mother

The state of the nation

Will I ever sleep again?

If I have a vaginal delivery will I ever want to have sex again?

Something/anything that brings to mind the term “medical emergency” and/or trauma of any sort happening to the baby/toddler/child/ young adult

patricia

Every one of these worries is legit except for the Yankees pitching rotation. Actually, I worry about that too, like which Ace is Steinbrenner going to buy for the playoff run?

I worried about every one of those things when i was pregnant, and I somehow thought that if I knew it could happen, it wouldn't happen to me. Now I know better. It happens even if you do worry about it. Or not. Usually not.

I don't know who Adama and Starbuck are. Does that mean I'm not a nerd?

Anyways, I'm worrying about the supreme court and Karl Rove too

Rebekah

I realize I'm a bit late in responding to this entry, but I had to put in a quick note. Two words about grocery shopping with a baby in NYC ... Fresh Direct. I don't know if you've used it already, but it has been a GODSEND for me! Some people complain about the produce, but I've been very happy with it. Even if you just use it to buy everything but your fruits and veggies, it can save you SO much time, and I've been very pleased with their prices. It beats the hell out of maneuvering a stroller through the teeny tiny aisles at Key Foods. I rarely use anything but FD anymore these days.

That being said, and I apologize for the small contradiction here, grocery shopping isn't THAT bad with a baby. You may have to switch up when you go (as in, waiting until your DH gets home so that he can stay with the baby), but when A. was a new baby, I found it to be a nice "outting" for the day. It got me out of the house for a while and we both got some fresh air and a change of scenery for a little bit.

Jenifer

You don't need to have an air conditioner in winter. This could be the reasons for one of the night terrors you have mentioned above.

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