« We Interrupt This Broadcast | Main | Silly, Ironic, Terrible »



i don't think it is ever proper to allow your child (regardless of age) to make a mess and leave it for someone else to clean up. i feel the same about animals too. my dog goes on someones lawn (or in a park or wherever) i clean it up. i don't care if no one is there to see. it is my dog, my responsibility. same with my son. if he drops stuff on the floor i clean it up or now that he is old enough, he does it.
otherwise you end up with over-privaliged kids. oh, wait, i think we have some of that now...


I agree with Kris.

I watched another Mom indulge her child at the grocery store today... It was a busy time, and the little girl wanted to HELP the checker scan. The Mom didn't stop the little girl. The checker looked apologetic, but he was too nice to tell the little girl no...

Thus, the little girl helped the checker hold each item up to the scanner.

It took a long time. The Mom smiled and said, "you know how it is with kids...."

What do you think? Is that indulgent or am I just in too much of a hurry?


How you handled the raisins was good manners.

How your guest acted was bad manners.

Kids have to learn to live in a world with other people from the beginning, it's not a "get to it when it's age appropriate" project.


I agree with the others. You are a model for your children, and by picking up those raisins, you are modeling good behavoir and being conscious of others. There is simply not enough of that going on these days, as your guest showed.


You did the right thing, kids should never be allowed to create a mess. How will they learn good behavior.

For the poster above regarding the checkout scanner, I would have exploded. Come on, maybe one item but that's it. And I am pretty laid back parent but it is not ok to be rude to others.


I usually ask the host what the rules are of the house. For example in our house no food or drink is allowed in the living room. If it was, I'd be vacuuming and carpet cleaning every day. We have a sizable kitchen and the rule is that food stays there. Sometimes we bend the rules with popcorn when we are having a family movie, but our drinks are lined up at the end of the island in the kitchen if we need a drink during the movie.

I think it's important to ask the rules of the house and then the parent should let the child know that those are the rules in that house. Kids get the idea that every house has different rules.

If you could eat in other rooms, and I was a guest, I'd pick up my child's mess. Now that my daughter is older (she's 8), I've instilled in her that she needs to clean up her own mess. If we're eating at Grandma's (who let's them eat dinner in the living room on a Twister mat as we run out of kitchen room at her house), I always make sure she cleans her plate and puts it in the sink or dishwasher.

So sorry your guests were so messy!


If it's your own house, you can permit whatever mess level you're comfortable with. But in someone else's house you pick up the darn Goldfish tout de suite!

I'd have been annoyed at your guest's behavior. In no etiquette book is it OK for someone to let their kid spill crackers on the rug and just LEAVE them there.


I am still laughing my a$$ off at "She-Who-Will-Not-Be-Contained"!!!!!

Jenn (dish)

It is definitely never too early for kids to learn good behavior--I guess that other mom doesn't agree. I think if it were me I would have probably tried to intervene while making light of the situation, "Oh look, honey, your goldfish are trying to escape all over the floor. Let's get a fishbowl to keep them at the table so there are plenty for you to eat." And I would have gently taken the bag of crackers and dumped them into something resembling a fishbowl. But I also have the excuse of dog hair on the floor which makes eating fallen food completely verboten (we do vacuum, but it seems to reappear almost instantly).

Parenting Instructions

A good post regarding Children Behavior and the parents tendency towards the same.

Thanks for posting.


You handled the raisins in a great way. I think it was proper. Must say you are an example to your kid! This is Alice from Israeli Uncensored News.

The comments to this entry are closed.